Review time.

This is a rough start to the short story I began.

Johnny and the Alien.

Johnny loved playing in the woods at the back of his house.

It was his place, his own personal jungle where he could hide from the hordes of Indian Braves that were always on the lookout or a scalp or two. It was where he played Cowboys and Indians, Cops and Robbers and sometimes, if there were other children, he got to play War.

Even if there weren't other kids hanging around in the woods Johnny could use his imagination to conjure up an enemy, or ten, whom he could track. Luckily, Johnny had an imaginary friend who was a superlative actor who could play an Indian tracker with consummate skill.

On the day Johnny met the alien he was playing in the mudpool. Johnny that is, not the Alien. Aliens don't play in mudpools. They're too busy studying the mysteries of the universe, making crop circles and buzzing Air Force jets to concern themselves with the joys of the mudpool.

Johnny was pushing an armored personnel carrier, which to a grown-up would have looked very much like a brick, through the mudpool when he saw a bright flash and heard a loud thud. Johnny looked up from his world-in-a-mudpool and saw something glinting through the trees.

The road above the wood was tight and once in a while a car would take the bend too fast and end up going through the guard-rail. Johnny went to investigate who had crashed their car just in case they needed help. If it was a bad accident he could run back to his house and tell his mom to phone the local doctor to come and assist the people who had been in the car wreck.

As he walked through the woods, Johnny could hear a strange humming noise. It reminded him of the noise his spinning top, that he got from his aunt May three birthdays ago, made.

Johnny walked towards the noise and ducked down to pass through the thick bushes and trees.

When Johnny saw the vehicle that was upside down in the ditch he said the word that he used for moments like this.
"Wow." He said.
It wan't a big word, by any means, but when you're only 8 years old and have just seen a flying saucer upside down in a ditch "Wow." is as big a word as you can think of.

When Johnny walked towards the craft he saw a hatch open in the side of it. A noise like the school fire alarm was coming from the inside of the ship and a strange noise, almost like the bathroom sink when it got blocked, was slooping and gurgling inbetween the shriek of the alarm sound.

Johnny took a few steps towards the spaceship and tried to get a look inside. He was too far away to see anything so he took a few more steps. And a few more. And a few more, until he was almost able to reach out and touch it.

And that was when he got the fright of his life.

As he took his last step a crash came from inside the ship. A small greenish-grey looking thing fell out of the craft and landed with a kersplodge, much like the sound of a dropped jelly, onto the hatch...

To be continued? Any comments would be welcomed.