I just read an article on t'internet that started with that horribly personal insult. Don't ask me for the link as I was so incensed I rapidly had to go and look at some porn to re instill my faith in the fairer sex. That's a joke ladies... I'm all for feminism, women's lib and equality of the sexes. After all, you deserve it, don't you, you pretty little things.
Anyhoo... What's wrong with being over 35 and single? I'll tell you what... The horrible aching hollow you feel in the heart when you pull cold covers over your body at night... The nights of lonesomeness weeping into a Kleenex after watching a pirate copy of the new Sex and the City movie... The female friends setting you up with friends who have a reputation for being "Easy*" and that's not to mention the piles of invites to trendy art galleries where your city friends ply their trade and give you free champers.
That's my life right there. Aye right... Is... It... Fuck...
There's no doubt that somebody in the world is over 35 and single and enjoying a life like that but trust me it's not yours truly. I'm more along the lines of, porn and pot noodle while I watch comedy DVD's and thank the stars that I'm as repulsive as it is humanly possible to be.
Porn. It's cheaper than dating.
* See: Would fuck a soccer team after a sniff of jagermeister.
2 comments:
I read some stats somewhere that there are now more single people in the world than married. That description of yourself sounds like any married person anyway: lonely, sleeping alone while the partner is in another room due to loud snoring, porn (on line is big business) for when sex is lean...I know more unhappy married people than happy singles. Anyway that's my 5 cents (used to be 2 but inflation..) worth.
Hey Ross...
All I can say is, been there, done that. Am there, still doing that. And I've got a two year lead on you. It sucks. But you know what, it's still not the end of the world... It just feels like it. LOL!
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