The reason I'm writing to you Lord is to ask a small request of you. I realise that you're a busy entity, what with the universe to run and all, but this really is something that needs your immediate attention.
As I'm sure you know, I live in Scotland (Good job by the way it's a lovely place, the work you must have put into the Highlands was above and beyond...) and we as a nation are undergoing a crisis on a magnitude never known before in these here parts.
The trouble is that it's way to hot. There's a heatwave going on just now and we as a race are ill equipped to deal with it. More than 35% of the population is ginger and the rest are fair haired, have pale skin and burn like sausages on an unattended barbecue if we are in the sun for more than 21 seconds a day.
When I grew up in the 70's I only ever had one bath a week unless of course there was a family gathering going on, in which case we were scrubbed to within an inch of our lives so we didn't show ourselves up, whereas now I'm having to take three showers a day to try to keep from spontaneously combusting.
So Lord, all I ask is that you put down whatever it is you're working on at the moment and do something about this heat.
Yours, hoping that I'm not tempting your wrath,
Ross Douglas.
1 comment:
So that's where our summer went. We are experiencing a lot of rain here which is unusual. We are rusting away. Thank God we had aircon.
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