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And for my next trick...

It was early today, around 1pm which is early for me, when I decided that I should go and give the front of the pub a wash down to get rid of the accumulated traffic grime. A bucket of soapy water and a brush were grabbed from the cleaning cupboard and off I went.

Looking up I noticed that the windows could do with a wash so I went inside and got the keys for the gratings that cover the windows. As I'm not tall enough to reach the padlock I grabbed a chair from the bar, took it outside and plonked it down in front of the bucket of water, and proceeded to stand on it to enable me to reach the lock.

Having unlocked the grating I swung it open and stepped backwards off of the chair. This is when my left foot landed squarely in the bucket of soapy water. And that was the reason I spent the day wearing a pair of Jenny's other half's jean shorts that were 3/4 length on me due to his being at least a foot taller than I am.

Now playing: Elbow - Station Approach


Whoever said...

Pain was close to pleasure has obviously never slammed like Danny Way did at the 14th Xgames on the skate megaramp.

That's gotta hurt.

Danny Way not only slammed hard but against the odds got up and went again.
Balls like a bull I tell ya. Balls like a bull.

This cracked me up...

So I give you an opperchancity to do so as well.

I Hate Nature from Olde English Comedy on Vimeo.


She laid her soul bare...

With one sentence. And inside me, my heart resonated like a church bell.

Her eyes shone like stars piercing the curtain of the night sky. And still I saw the sadness.

This perfect woman who said so much. With so few words.

She bid me farewell and I kissed her lace gloved covered hand.

And now she sleeps somewhere. Dreaming not of I.

Now playing:
Jeff Buckley - Forget Her


It's not Christmas...

But it's a wonderful life...


Here's a quote I'd like to have noted as being said by me...

"If it is truth you seek do not listen to politicians, listen to comedians."


Blessed lord of acceleration...

Light em if you got em...

More than just a clock...

Edinburgh council are currently planning to move the Heart of Midlothian War Memorial from its home at Haymarket for the duration of the works on the new tram system. The council have also suggested that this move culminates in a new permanent site at Atholl Crescent, located off the main street and behind a row of protected trees - in other words, out of sight of the main thoroughfare.

This memorial was built to commemorate those who committed the ultimate sacrifice and has served as a daily reminder of those who gave their lives. From a historical perspective, it is one of the most important war memorials in this country and is one of the only sites to continue to host services of remembrance to this day. It is a Hearts monument, but it also serves as a focal point for Hibernian, Raith Rovers and Falkirk - all of whom were represented by players and supporters alike in the famous McCrae's Battalion.

It is much much more than just bricks and mortar and should continue to be sited in a prominent place at Haymarket, not tucked away out of view for the sake of a tram system which can quite easily accommodate a new site for the monument. This was the council's original idea and was accepted during public consultation for the planning application - the council now wish to go back on what they promised us and remove the monument from Haymarket altogether.

An action group has been set up to raise awareness of this issue and liaise with the council in order to prevent this from happening, but it's all very much in the early stages at the moment. Please remember that the attendance at this year's service could serve as the most poignant reminder of what this memorial means to the people of Edinburgh, and to the supporters of Heart of Midlothian Football Club, Hibernian Football Club and a lot of Edinburgh's residents.

Try to be there on November 9th if you can.

Please sign this petition - the old clock needs your help.

If you want to know more about the story of McCrae's Battalion, please visit here.


The Turner Prize...

I'm no art critic, and the lord knows I'm no artist, but what's the gig with the Turner Prize?

Last year the Turner was won by someone dressed in a bear costume wandering around an art gallery and this years entrants features; A mannequin on a toilet with assorted crap nailed to it and scattered porridge at its feet[1], a piece entitled "Different Sky (rain)"[2] which is essentially a white wall with occasional off vertical lines painted onto it and other "artistic" (my quotes) installations like a woman smashing china teacups onto the floor. Another of the entrants has submitted a piece that is a recreation of textiles originally designed by a German artist for the 1929 international exhibition in Barcelona.



Now the thing I'd like to know is, can anyone enter the competition? If so I would like to submit my bedroom floor as an example of societies irrational and contemptuous affair with the world around it. In fact, I've got the urge to glue the empty pizza boxes in my kitchen into an armchair to show the Turner prize judges that it's not just hoity toity lazy bastards who refuse to get a job and instead call themselves artists that can cobble together any old shite and call it art.

Backing up your blog...

Has never been easier than the little gizmo bloggerbackup from those lovely people at Codeplex.

Drop by if you want an easy way to backup a blog.



Isn't for everyone but no matter who you are you have to admire the dedication required to develop the skills involved.

Fully Flared from Sturge on Vimeo.