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That's that fucked then...

I slid out of my bed at 7:00am this morning and slunked to the bathroom, shit, showered and shaved in preparation for my new job. At 7:30 I hauled my bike downstairs and began the five mile cycle through the Edinburgh traffic to my new workplace.

"Hey Slaphead; Got a light?"

Once there I parked my bike, walked to the paper shop, bought my copy of MCN and stood outside smoking like a protesting Buddhist to kill the spare hour I had due to being there way too early. (I didn't know how long it would take me to cycle five miles. I'm overweight, unfit, have asthma and smoke very heavily.)

After a cigarette intake that would make the most hardened laboratory Beagle sit up and say "Holy shit man, are you sponsored by Phillip Morris?" I shuffled into the new workplace and was greeted by the friend who had suggested me to the owner.

My friend explained the gig and I set about getting ready for the day ahead. During conversation my friend asked if I'd signed off the dole and I replied that I had. "You do know that this is only a part time job. You're only needed for three days a week." My friend revealed.

So now I'm faced with having to go back to the dole to sign back on and will have to tell the employer that I'm unable to work due to the lack of hours.



Stand and Deliver, Nigger.

Todays comedy clip comes from the undisputed king of African/American comedy Mr Richard Pryor.


After several months...

Of sleeping late and watching TV until the wee small hours I've finally managed to land myself a new job. Yippee! (Can you detect the sarcasm?)

I start on Wednesday morning at nine.


Stand and Deliver...

Todays comedy video comes from Steven Wright.


Oh, one more thing... I keep thinkin' I'mma randy goat fuckin' everyone...

Todays comedy gem is from the master of stand up. Bill Hicks.

Never before...

Have I came across an electrical gadget and been so impressed with it.

I took a wander into town yesterday afternoon with the intention of buying a new book to read and ended up buying an Ipod.

Now all I have to do is decide what music to put onto it.


Scottish Motor Show 2007

These pictures were taken at the Scottish Motor Show which was held today at Knockhill Racing Circuit.

Nil Desperandum...

Over the last few weeks I've been giving serious consideration to scrapping my blog due to "them" being on guard awaiting me to reveal details of my former workplace and suing my balls off.

Tonight I came to the following decision...

Fuck 'Em.

This is my blog... You don't like it? Don't read it.


Something to while away a spare hour...

From here on in I'll be posting the occasional stand-up comedy video of comedians I rate.

First up is George Carlin. Enjoy.

*Please note*
This routine contains strong opinions and occasional "bad" language.


By popular demand...

My blog has now been changed back to the old look.