I am in need of a new career. Any suggestions?
answers on a postcard to the usual address.

My job is slowly, but surely, driving me insane. Surely there is more to life than this? There has to be. If I have to spend the next 20 years of my life working in jobs I hate with people I can't abide I'm positive I'm going to become just another headline. I'd rather not that the first time I get my name in a newspaper be titled "Heavily armed man goes on rampage, kills 30."

The problem is that I am only good at one thing, making a total Arse of myself. And there are not many job ads for that in the appointments section.

WANTED

Qualified fool.

Must be fully competent in stupidity.

(High court judges need not apply)

Have you ever seen that? No. Me either.

What is there that I can do to change the situation I am in?

Pack my current job in and get a new one? fuck that. I'd only end up in another deadend job working under some retarded fuckwit who thinks that he/she is better than I am 'cos they have a salary that is twice what mine is.

Become self employed? Out of the question I'm afraid as I am not qualified to do anything. At all.

Join a cult? hmmmmm, now there is an idea. Then again you only have to look at the history of cult movements throughout time to realize that they are fucked from the outset.

So what to do? Well, I have a fancy to try Stand-up comedy. No don't laugh, well actually do.