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6/28/2008

...

4:16am

It's only me, the snails and an urban fox that are wandering the pathways. Early dawn light filters through the low cloud base and teases at the shadows of houses filled with sleeping people. Children lie in their beds sleeping the sleep of the innocent and parents sleep sound in the knowledge that their progeny are safe from the horrors of the world.

My mind is empty yet there is something on my mind. Thus the reason I wander the streets with my cigarettes, my thoughts and the company of early morning songbirds. I consider calling someone to talk but the only people awake at this time are in far off lands where the day is already half done. These people are in the wrong frame of mind to deal with me and my baggage so I forget the idea and continue walking.

The 24 hour garage offers an oasis where I can get a drink but the doors are locked to prevent robberies. "No customer admittance between the hours of 1am and 7am" A sign on the door reads. I try the door, a futile gesture, and am stared at by the night shift idiot. I knock on the door and am greeted with a look of mistrust from the guy on duty. I try to explain myself through the small gap in the door.

"Read the sign!" He shouts to make himself heard through the strengthened security glass.
"All I want is something to drink and a chocolate bar. I'm not going to rob you." I say, pleadingly.
"Fuck off now or I'll call the police!" He shouts, waving the telephone as though it were a sword and he was defending a castle against a horde of invaders.
"All I want is a drink." I say, giving the door another push.
"I'm dialing now!" Comes the reply.

Giving the door a light kick, I turn to walk away before he decides I am a genuine threat and dials the federales. "Whatever happened to trust in your fellow man!" I bellow as I walk away. I turn to see that the night shift nitwit has the phone to his ear and is speaking to someone.

I figure he is merely making it appear to me that he is calling for assistance rather than actually calling in the cavalry and alter my route slightly so that I am out of his sight. The less he can tell the cops, if they are indeed on their way, the better.

Lighting another cigarette and taking care not to tread on the snails that occupy the pathways I wander homeward. The early morning light has turned the low clouds an orange tint and a wail of a siren in the distance is carried on the breeze.

All is peaceful in the world. Or so it seems.

Inside my heart I know that is false and the thought depresses me.

Somewhere on this planet...
A Mother is mourning a son lost to a war she does not understand...
A Father is identifying the body of his raped and murdered daughter...
A Sister is weeping for her stillborn child...
A Brother is sucking in lungfuls of carbon monoxide as the car engine idles...
A Child is starving...

Could you sleep knowing these things?

6 comments:

A 2 Z said...

It seems nowadays a lot of people have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep. Imagine trying to sleep in SA. Thats when my troubles started and had to take meds to finally stay asleep more than an hour. Thing is now that I am back in Canada I am addicted to these meds and continue taking them. I find that everything seems more severe and gloomy at night. I have found some books from E. Tolle that help when I cant sleep. One of his best ones is "A new Earth". The first two chapters are boring but the rest is mind altering. He is able to restore my confidence in this insane world we live in. :)

Divemaster GranDad said...

Cuzz...being safe in the knowledge that none of the items you mention apply to me or mine (and hopefully never will), giving me a (false) sense of security, allows me to sleep. If one were to ponder all the evils going on in the world, one would never sleep. I say, if it's not affecting me or mine, leave it alone...

Selfish, maybe, but I'm not going to stress (and lose sleep) over things I have no control over...

Do the same...and get some sleep...

Unknown said...

a 2 z,
Thanks for the comment.

I often sleep very well but on occasion I find it difficult and end up spending the night awake and deep in thought about the state of the world. Over the years I have grown accustomed to it and don't fret it too much.

I've got a copy of E Tolle's book A new Earth winging it's way towards me as I type and will give it a bash. Thanks for the reccomendation. (even if it turns out to be a big pile of steaming horseshit.)

How about an invite to read your blog?

Steve-o,
How goes it mucker? All well and good I hope. Thanks for the wise words. once more you have proven to me that there is wisdom in the family.

Give my regards to Steph, your dad and your mum.

Divemaster GranDad said...

Cuzz...doing okay here, mostly on my own as Steph has up and left me and moved to Cape Town on her own. Nah, that's not quite true... she has transferred down there to get settled into her new job as they needed her badly. She flies up every second weekend for a few days (and for some legover). We're battling to sell the house as the market (thanks to the Yanks and their sub-zero housing rate fiasco) is dead and we also have high interest rates, coupled with petrol price hikes and inflation because of both the aforementioned. Make no mistake, as soon as the house is old, I'll be languishing on a beach too...

Will pass on your regards...thanks.

Send mine to the family as well, and thank your mum and dad (and the rest of you) for looking after Angie on your holiday.

Divemaster GranDad said...

PS.......A2Z is a bit of a lurker, preferring to read blogs and pass comments rather than have a blog herself. Seems to be a very nice person though from the communications we've had over the months... :-)

Unknown said...

Steve-o,
So it's a case of when the cats away? I take it you are writing your blog so you have an alibi. Good thinking batman.

Will tell the troop you were asking for them. They are all fine and dandy. Sarah is now a Taxi driver, Stuart is still a geek 9but we love him) and maw and paw are doing well.

A 2 Z does have a blog but you need an invite to read it so i'm assuming that it's either a) Chock full of porn or b) a terrorist network hell bent on chaos and destruction. In which case I wish them well. It's about time chaos was given a chance. :)